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Q: How long have you been a Celebrant?
A: Just over six years now.
Q: Why did you become one?
A: My mum died and I felt it was really important to have a funeral that would really reflect her life, I was desperate to find someone to help and just couldn’t. We as a family did the best we could in the short time we had. Afterwards I was determined to find out about Ceremonies, research and find some training so I could help others in the same situation. So in a way, my work has become a way of honouring my lovely mum, Jessie! I now create several ceremonies a month, not just funerals and being a Celebrant has become my full time job.
Q: What’s your background?
A: My childhood was spent living in many different countries across the world and my playmates were always children of varied cultural and religious backgrounds and I always loved joining in with their everyday rituals within their families. I trained as a teacher of primary school children which I adored but
drawn towards the theatre. I went to drama school and then worked as an actress playing leading roles in repertory theatre, working in radio and on TV and running my own community theatre company. I then became a mum, and helped establish a large Community in the countryside, taking time out to design and build an eco house.
Other skills acquired along the way which I think help me in my work today are living in a Scottish croft, growing my own food and becoming really fond of the countryside. Being a chef in charge of a lively and chaotic London restaurant kitchen, essential organising skills!
Q: But what about other ceremonies?
A: Well, I became so immersed in and fascinated by the whole concept of ceremony, that I was asked to create a wedding, then another and then a babynaming. The response was overwhelming, I suddenly felt I was in the right place, I was so enjoying myself! I then moved onto creating lots of different ceremonies. I really feel a good ceremony can change they way people come to terms with grief, strengthen their relationships, and in many circumstances go through a life changing transition.
Q: What about your training?
A: I personally don’t feel there is an adequate training scheme in England at the moment which is accredited by an outside educational body. However that is about to change, the Association of Independent Celebrants is researching and refining a decent training programme using the Australian College of Celebrancy as a important model. I’m an early member of the Association.
And a really important arts organisation, Welfare State International, hold fabulous, creative full time workshops exploring ceremony, these are run by Sue Gill and Gilly Adams. Their ideas are wonderful and they are constantly exploring new avenues. They truly inspired me and have kept me focused through the years.
So I’m self taught, using hours of careful research, exhaustive reading, visiting so many different people and places to help me refine my Celebrant skills. My life journey has provided me with many skills and I’m delighted my theatrical skills are finally been put to a special use, they are actually helping people in a profound way.
My professional feedback comes from the people I have supported through special times in their lives. The letters I receive are wonderful, they make me feel very humble in their praise for the work I do.
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Q: How long have you been a Celebrant?
A: Just over 6 years now. I’ve always been fascinated by ceremony for as long as I can remember. My Mum and Dad often tell (embarrassingly!) the ‘weird’ but funny story of how aged 10, I got my friends to act out the State Funeral of John F Kennedy, in our garden; there I was lying in State, under a ‘Union Jack ‘, shouting out ceremony instructions to my friends. I conducted my first wedding at the age of seven in the coal shed at the back of our house, for Ian Lowry and Wendy Popples, sadly they separated by the time they where eleven! An argument over sweets I think. Burying departed pets was always a big production number as well.
Q: What’s your background?
A: I grew up in Liverpool, amongst a big family and lively community. We were always encouraged to shout out about ourselves, our achievements; not to show off, but to share the joy of being and to be proud of one another. We would gather round the piano and sing songs, tell stories when the family got together, we would celebrate.
I enjoyed being part of the Church community and as my Dad was a Catholic and my Mum was ‘C of E’ I got the best of both worlds, from marching with the boy Scouts proud to hold the pack flag high, to running round the corner to mass at ‘The Blessed Sacrament Church to be an altar boy; I loved the spectacle of the high mass, with the incense. Bell, book and candle.
I initially trained as a Social Worker, after school, but was spotted through a college production of ‘Under Milk Wood’ I was invited to work as a professional actor at the ‘Library Theatre Manchester’. Acting has been my successful career for the past 28 years, I’ve worked in Film, TV, Radio, Musical Theatre, The West End and in Rep’.
My stage name is Peter Faulkner and I am still actively involved in performance art. Theatre is grand ceremony really. It was at the Library Theatre I met and fell in love with Belinda.
Q: Why did you become one?
A: Belinda was the inspiration but once I saw the potential I was hooked.
Ceremony to me is essential to a healthy community.
I would often be at a party to celebrate the opening of a theatre show say, or a special birthday, it would be fun, but I always felt niggling in the back of my mind that not enough fuss or focus was being made of the ‘individual’ or ‘event’... For example; I found myself at a gathering for two very dear friends, who were making a commitment to spending their lives together, cementing their relationship, by way of having a party; though it was just a party, we all knew in reality the event was a ‘formal’ and important an ‘commitment’ for them; that’s why they’d asked us all their friends and family to be there, to witness... The invite was something like... to Celebrate Our Being Together for... years and as lovely as this was nothing formal was said... You know the moment... after the all important candles have been blown out, the cake has been cut, everyone is shouting speech, speech, speech... and no one does... of course someone mumbles a thank you, someone say’s something cynical and we all chuckle and raise our glass... Cheers! it’s done in all sincerity and with great fun, but is that it?... Really the room is bursting with people who want to say, ‘we love you, we support you, and we will all be there for you we are so happy you are sharing this moment with us’.
I believe sometime things need to be said ‘loud and proud’... in a unique way, to everyone...
Now on that occasion I didn’t open my mouth but I came away wishing I had said something.
I knew I had the skills to do it. I believed it was important enough that I should , and I was off on a journey with Belinda to find the best way to encourage people to mark moments and make the most of ceremonies, life’s too short.
Q: What about Training and professional standards?
A: Conducting a Ceremony is a responsibility I take very seriously, you only get one chance with a Ceremony.
Of course I draw upon my skills as an actor, public speaker, musician and theatre producer. These skills make the Ceremonies we conduct easy to be part of, quick to produce and very affordable.
I am expert at speaking in public and holding an audience, people have confidence in me that it’s going to be fun and relaxed if it should be. Formal and marked with respect in the case of other Ceremonies.
People put time aside and a lot of faith in you to create that moment when they can express (say) those all important (words)concepts of love, commitment, of acknowledgement or forgiveness, to make an offering or pay a lasting tribute.
There are many wonderful templates and structures for ceremony within our own culture and I drew upon them when starting out and am still influenced by them but I have found that each Ceremony becomes unique for everyone’s life journey is unique and I needed to have the resource to carry out my job properly.
To guide me in developing the content of ceremonies, I turned to Sue Gill and John Fox Artistic Directors & founders of ‘Welfare State International’ and also producers of www.deadgoodguides.com pioneers of community and celebratory arts and trained with them.
I also went out to Melbourne Australia to meet Dally Messenger the founder of the International Federation of Celebrants, www.collegeofcelebancy.com/aus where they invented Civil Celebrants, whilst here I also took a course with David Oldfield of The Foundation For Contemporary Mental Health Institute and The Midway Centre for Creative Imagination www.midwaycentre.com I worked with him gaining a certification to conduct his excellent programme The Journey; a creative approach to the necessary crisis of adolescence; or rite of passage ceremonies.
Whilst in Melbourne I spent a lot of time working with other celebrants on weddings and ‘baby naming’ seeing how it was done over there.
Belinda and I work together very closely guiding and helping one another.
I am also in constant dialogue with other artists and makers of ceremonial art for ideas and inspiration.
On a practical level too we are always aware of our clients health and safety during events and are we fully insured through La Player www.laplya.co.uk one of the leading events insurers. We are also members of the UK Association of Independent Celebrants www.aoic.org.uk.
Q: What About Other Ceremonies?
A: Personal Ceremony
These are ceremonies devised to acknowledge a specific personal issue, problem or transition in an individual’s life. Often these ceremonies are witnessed by only a handful of people. Often they are abstract in content and ritual and the issue may never be disclosed literal , the way one would appreciate a dance piece for example but the deep issues shared in this way can often lead to joyous breakthroughs in relationships and personal well being.
Often other Ceremonies are invented by you. People come into our shop with fabulous ideas.
We organise Ceremonies for the:
- Renewal of vows
- Coming of age ceremony
- Businesses celebrations, Ceremonies to acknowledging special moments in the work place is important ... remember you probably spend more time and go through more heightened moments with work colleagues, than you do with some of your nearest and dearest.
- Change of career
- House warming’s
- Gatherings of old friends, is a good one, and my favourite to organise for people often this entails an adventurous walk with small surprise events along the way and reminders for everyone to bring those wonderfully embarrassing photo’s from happy yesterday’s and lots of stories of shared times.
- Memories
We provide the simple structure’s to allow the moments when everyone can express themselves.
Hope to see you soon, check out the site, Seize the day.
Peter
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